HER OWN SPACE IN MY HEART

Haylie Anne.
Her name means Hero of Grace.

Baby girl would be 32 today. I imagine she’d be a mix of my other two daughters—beautiful, kind, tender hearted, loving, aggressive, God loving—an amazing vibrant woman.

30 years ago I held her for the last time. Sometimes it seems like yesterday.

After she died I wanted another baby so bad, my arms literally ached. One year later I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. It was then I realized, each child has their own space in my heart. He had his place and it was overflowing. Haylie’s place  was still empty. Over time I learned to let Jesus fill this space in my heart.

Today, August 11th, I woke up to that tug of emptiness. Come Jesus.

As I sipped my cup of tea, I reflected on her and the last 30 years—I cried. I am always amazed that there are those moments that I still cry. But then, sweet Jesus reminds me of that place in my heart owned by her. And whispers “it’s okay.”

I am honored that I was chosen to be her mother. This “Hero of Grace” swept through my life and changed me forever. And I am grateful.

The three most dominant things that were gifted to me by her life and death are:

One:  The awareness that everyday—every person—my family, is a gift to enjoy to the fullest. I never know about tomorrow, so I won’t waste today.
Two:  Only Jesus can fill and heal my empty brokenness.
Three:  To live with passion against the enemy of my soul. After Haylie died I was angry at God. I saw myself shaking my fist at Him. In His faithfulness He addressed my anger. He gently said “Why don’t you shake your fist at your enemy, where it will do you some good.” Since then I am beyond passionate to stand in faith for what I believe in, to fight for my family’s destiny and not give in—not one inch, to the plan of darkness that comes to kill, steal and destroy.

In so many ways I have been given beauty for ashes.

Isaiah 61:3 says
To comfort those who mourn
To give them beauty for ashes
Joy for mourning,
Praise for heaviness;
They will be called trees of righteousness—the planting of the Lord, for His glory.

Look at all this beauty—all these trees! Thankful, I am.

Today please be encouraged to seize the day! Hug your kids, hug your parents! Tell them you love them! And please give Jesus every empty place in your heart. Lastly, stand in faith for your family’s destiny—it’s worth it!

 

 

 

No Want

What would your world be like if you had no wants? Is it almost too hard to even imagine? But doesn’t a want free life sound inviting? Want, is so much a part of who we are—it’s part of our culture. But, it is not part of Gods culture.
Read for yourself…

Psalm 23:1 says

The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want.

Psalm 34:8,

Blessed is the man who trusts in Him. Fear the Lord, there is no want to those who fear Him. Those who seek the Lord shall not lack any good thing.

Philippians 4:19

My God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

In others words, We have no lack—no need.

This is a really bold statement. Think about it for a moment.

The gist of this truth is that when we fill our heart and soul with Jesus and allow Him to be our Shepherd—our Lord, then all our wants and needs are met—we are full. We do not want or need anything else. Jesus is enough.

I’m not just referring to spiritual needs. No, this kind of faith meets all needs, spiritual, mental, physical, financial and relational.

Often times when you read verses like these you tend to think. “Yes, one day, this will be my reality. One day, (hopefully soon) God will supply all my need.” Or “When God gives me what I want, then I shall not want”

The problem with this mindset is that it causes you to focus even more on your want and need. When the fact is God has already come through. Jesus—the cross—the empty grave, have come through and made a way for these scriptures to be your reality right now. Believing this truth causes you to put your focus where it should be—on Jesus.

People who live by the standard of culture, or their own human nature, do not believe unless they see. People who live by faith, believe before they see, and take the Bible at face value. Bible believers know that it is against Jesus’ character to lie or be unfaithful. Therefore, if His Word says I have no want, and all my needs are supplied, then they are. Regardless of circumstance.

This truth is made fluid by living with the understanding that Jesus is enough. Enough for what? Absolutely everything!

Either God’s Word is true, or it’s not.

Please be encouraged to live a life of no want, by taking God’s Word at face value.

Link to the song “I shall not want” http://youtu.be/VRnFVMn0uZw

Hebrews 11:1

The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It’s our handle on what we can’t see.