Don’t Sit on the Sidelines

Do you ever find yourself sitting on the sidelines in life? What makes people sit on the sidelines? For me it was fear—it kept me at a distance from life and from living a faith dominated lifestyle.

The opposite of fear is faith…ponder this a moment—if in any area of our life we are fearful—it’s a trust issue and the antidote is faith. The bottom line is—when we have true faith in God there is no room for fear.

As I’ve mentioned before I’ve been on a giant (wonderful and sometimes painful) journey to strengthen my faith. The amount of fear in my life was the tell-tale sign that lead me on this expedition in search of unmovable—relentless faith.

On this mission I first had to come to a major conclusion, which was God’s Faithfulness is Not On Trial  nor should it ever be. Yes, I have walked through many heart breaking adventures in my life, but God was never to blame.

Oh but the enemy of my soul was ever present to accuse God with subtle allegations, that unfortunately over time created a bed of comfort for me—a place in the midst of pain where I found a bit of shelter.

The bad news is when we agree with the devil it never turns out good! The good news is when we wander from truth, our gracious; long suffering shepherd always provides a way for us to return.

A good thing to realize about lack of faith is that it’s a heart issue—it’s a place in our heart needing to be perfected in His love. A place that simply needs to be let go of—a place where we make a beautiful exchange—our fear, pain and doubt for His unrelenting love and freedom.

Who wants to be partnered with fear anyway?

The Bible tells us,

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. (1 John 4:18)

I started off this blog intending to write about my big adventure this past weekend, but ended up writing about the my bigger adventure of acquiring deeper faith. The two adventures really do go hand in hand and the lesser of the two would not have been possible without the first…

One way fear effected me was that physically I was not very courageous. My husband and kids they are beyond courageous—they are borderline thrill seekers! And I normally just sit, watch (pray) and take pictures, but not this weekend!  Well…a third of this weekend—they participated in three courageous events and me—only one (maybe next year)!

I found myself fearless when on our family vacation, I decided to make the one hundred foot rock climb to a beautiful crystal clear waterfall. Yes friends I did it without hesitation!

Each step upward was made rock by rock. And when the climb got intense my husband and sons were before and behind me, ever faithfully holding out their hands, and pointing out the best places to next set my foot. Even when a snake popped his head out of a crack in the rocks and when another slithered on top of one sons foot, I kept going—even when spider webbed rocks where unsecured and shaky, yes even when the moss was slippery and the freezing waterfall pounded on my head and shoulders as I maneuvered across a one foot  wide, one hundred foot high ledge—I, by God’s grace, simply choose not to give fear a second thought!

The climb reminded me of my journey—my life. There always has been and always will be reasons to fear, but God in His unending faithfulness is right behind me—right behind you—and He’s ahead of us, holding out His hand, pointing out the best way to go. Encouraging us to take life one step (rock) at a time, never allowing us to fall—even when our feet land on unstable ground. And when the devil (that snake) rears his ugly head threatening us, we must realize all we have to fear is fear itself. And fear is really nothing but a facade. God’s the real deal and if we allow Him to perfect us in His love we can walk in the freedom He gave His life for, we can get off the sidelines and we can experience the waterfalls of life—crystal clear and refreshing.

Please be encouraged to strengthen your faith (click here to read how: Fully Convinced)—to say no to fear and all its restrictions and yes to God’s faithfulness!

 Simply beautiful—so glad I did’t miss out by sitting on the sidelines!

Here are some pictures of my family doing what they do…being adventurous! These are the ones I didn’t participate in!

       
The kids climbing down huge rocks leading into a vast canyon and beautiful oasis.

  Girls jumping off a bridge.

My husband and son sitting on top of this bridge before jumping off.

 

God doing what He does best…just being Himself.

 

 

Our Current Trial

What trial are you currently in? I want to share with you the one I just went through. As I eluded in my last blog Embrace the Unknown, God was calling me to step out onto the waters of the unknown. He wasn’t calming the storm before me—He wasn’t changing my circumstance then asking me to come. No, the wind was blowing and the waves were tossing!

The funny thing (it’s funny now) is the trail I was in was nothing I hadn’t experienced before. I’ve been in literal devastation—and lived tell of God’s faithfulness. In one summer not only did my childhood hero—my brother—die, but my two-year old daughter as well (read about it here Hero of Grace—Finding Treasure). Many times my marriage dangled by a mere thread. I’ve had three miscarriages, and been on the verge of death myself. We’ve lost our home and our business-starting over many times. I’ve had three of my dear sons walk away from the Lord—very heartbreaking—to say the least. I’ve been disowned by my family. And these are just the major events after marriage.

So I’m no stranger to suffering, what was so different about my current trial? I believe it was different because this time I knew (sort of) what I was fighting for. And as I look back over all the years, I see I was always fighting for the same thing.

It was a fight for my faith.

Your current trial is a fight for your faith.

For about the last year I’ve been in a season of purposefully strengthening my faith—my goal is to be fully convinced without wavering, (Romans 4:20). Therefore in this trial I was fighting to believe God’s Word and the devil was fighting for his ground of unbelief in my heart. God was purposing to remove a deeper layer of fear in my life—namely the fear-of-lack. Fear rooted it’s self in my life when I was a child. It makes sense—God’s plan for my life is that I’d be a person of deep, unwavering faith—the devil’s plan—just the opposite—fear.

Throughout my years of suffering I could feel God’s comfort, and even when the sea of the unknown tossed, as I remember it now, I felt I was in the boat. This time He stood out on the frenzied ocean, extending His hand, asking me to step out on a sea of unknown waters—to trust Him even as it raged.

I’m sure He’s always wanted this scenario and every battle I’ve fought has brought me nearer to this. And while I’m embarrassed to just now, decades after becoming a Christian, come to this place, on the other hand God is ecstatic with me!

I really thought I failed in this current trial, because my head continually bobbed in and out of the water. The heavy hand of the enemy’s oppression—the spirit of unbelief—continually tried to push my head under. I couldn’t sleep and when I did, I’d wake in panic. Worry overwhelming me like never before. The difference was—I fought tooth and nail to believe God’s promises. The harder I fought the heavier it got. Some days I sat all day just reading the Word or listening to worship music, continually praying—determined to own what I claim to believe.

I felt like I wavered, (I’m always way harder on myself than God is). He told me I won the battle the moment I determined to believe—the moment I chose to sit all day reading His Word instead of escaping by sleeping or watching a movie.

The bummer to pressing in while in battle with the enemy is that he presses harder. But God came running to save me the moment I began to falter. And in His faithful love He waited, watching and interceding for my success, holding back breakthrough—until just the right hour, knowing stronger unwavering faith was my real need.

What’s your real need? Breakthrough or stronger faith?

Have you ever read the book of Job? God allowed catastrophes (plural) to strike him. In it the enemy of his soul had a plan, which was to steal Job’s faith and get Him to curse God. God’s plan for Job was that he would not just know about Him but for Job to actually know Him, making God Lord of all—this meant Job’s faith would have to be foolproof.

Over the years God has delivered me from many aspects of fear and I’m very happy to say I am now on the other side of this battle—the fear-of-lack and the spirit of lack its self are broken off my life! You have got to love the faithfulness of God!

This is my song of thanksgiving to God! Psalm 34:1-7,

I will bless the Lord at all times; His praise shall continually be in my mouth. My soul shall make its boast in the Lord. The humble shall hear of it and be glad. Oh, magnify the Lord with me, And let us exalt His name together. I sought the Lord, and He heard me, And delivered me from all my fears. They looked to Him and were radiant, And their faces were not ashamed. This poor man cried out, and the Lord heard him And saved him out of all his troubles. The angel of the Lord encamps all around those who fear Him, And delivers them.

Please be encouraged in your current trial to understand it’s more about your faith than your need.

James 1:2-4 Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.

Change of Season

When the beautiful leaves of fall begin to flood the ground—my heart twinges—it’ll soon be winter. Of all the season changes this one causes me—the born and raised southern California girl, to have to mentally prepare.

My heart and life are experiencing an even vaster season change. Just the term used to describe it sounds wrong. Empty nest.

Truly, it’s not the fact that the kids grew up that aches my heart—it’s the rending—the separation—the change of season it self.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m over being sad, excited for the next season and I am gladly letting go of last season, ready to move forward—I just didn’t realize the ache would be so deep.

Two weeks ago today we packed up our youngest child and moved him to California, where he will begin fulfilling his God designed destiny. Before we left I went into his room to make sure nothing was forgotten—just the sight of the emptiness brought tears. I said oh God—I’m in trouble—it’s not even 6 AM on the first day of the trip and I’m crying! Ten minutes later with tears in his eyes my husband asks if I’ll be okay—more tears—this only lasted a few hours—thankfully our son was in a different car than us!

The day before the trip I sat at mid-day, amongst the chaos of preparations, in my chair needing my Father to hold me. In His faithfulness and this is the gist of what I want to share with you, He showed me that my heart is securely in His hand and He is massaging it. He knows the ache, He understands the season change and He’s put my heart in his tender care.

How faithful is God that He would accept the gift of our heart and take charge of it? I’m so grateful to be in a relationship with the One who knows and understands the smallest to the largest of heartache. He knew this time would come—this ache—and He knew just what to do.

This was an anticipated season change—every parent knows its coming, at times we even long for it. We prepare our children for adulthood—we teach them to walk, talk, feed themselves, use the potty,  get dressed on their own, read and write, take chances, speak out, be who God created them to be—that’s what we do as parents—every step of the way teaching them to be independent of us. By the grace of God we teach them to be excellent, strong, mature, loving, kindhearted, God filled—world changers.

Why then are we so taken off guard when those taught excellence, walk in excellence?

Because we have dared to love.

Dared to take God’s charge of carrying, giving birth to, training and finally releasing—yet again into God’s loving hands.

Letting go—always letting go—such is life.

The night before we said goodbye we were at his new church where he will start an internship, I looked over at my man-child—so handsome and so grown. He was worshiping the Lord—just as I taught him to do—giving God his all. As I wiped my tears the Lord softly said “He also is in my Hand.”

Everyone—everything—every season—always in His faithful hand.

Life—but a vapor is always bursting with season changes—no need to fear, be encouraged in knowing—your heart is being held by the heartbeat of heaven Himself.

Isaiah 43:13 Indeed before the day was, I am He And there is no one who can deliver out of My hand, I work, and who will reverse it?”

Isaiah 41:10 Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.

Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.

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Disappointment

Disappointment is an irritating nag that suffocates joy in our life. Learning the liberating secret that frees us from its heaviness—is vital. If we don’t get out from under disappointments thumb, we end up cynical and distrustful in life.

If disappointment is your constant companion as it used to be mine, I’ve got good news for you—disappointment is not a way of life.

Disappointment is a spirit that settles on you. It’s the opposite of wearing rose-colored glasses, you’re wearing glasses alright, but they are tinted with disappointment—everything you see, hear and do, comes and goes through their filter.

Disappointment established its residence in my life when I was young. I grew up without my father, seeing him maybe twice a month. He constantly promised big things and I believe he really wanted to deliver them, but because of his own dysfunction—he lacked the ability to see his word through. I always wanted to believe he would keep his word, even though my mom consistently warned me that he wouldn’t. Mostly he would show up late, or not at all and very seldom keep his grandiose promises.

As I grew up I continuously expected to be disappointed, that way when things didn’t work out, the pain of being let down would be softened.

I lived with the expectation that people would not keep their word and that they would eventually disappoint me. The problem with that mindset is that it’s judgmental. Wearing the glasses of disappointment causes us to weigh and measure others unjustly. These glasses also cause us to get into the mode of self-protection, where we mistrust and doubt love, becoming prone to offense.

Accordingly, we unhealthily guard our heart from love—forming walls. Every disappointing offense is brick and mortar—building for ourselves a nice little fortress around our heart—making it difficult for loved ones to penetrate, let alone God. The interesting fact about self-protection is that it breeds selfishness and sets us up to live in a world dictated by self.

The secret I’ve learned, is that my trust was misdirected. Granted parents, spouses and family should be trust worthy, but because we live in such a fallen selfish world, where sin abounds, some people are dysfunctional and do not know how to properly love each other. I now have grace for such people, since I myself used to be one!

What I mean by misdirected, is that we are trusting in all the wrong things and in the wrong people.

This may sound harsh, but God really is the only one who is completely trust worthy. Why? Because God is not human. Human nature at its best is not flawless, but God is.

This is a hard shift to make but completely doable, mainly we take a huge leap of faith and decide that yes, God’s Word—the Bible, is true and I am going to believe it! God is worthy of my trust and I am going to give it to Him!

Numbers 23:19 says,

God is not man, one given to lies, and not a son of man changing his mind. Does he speak and not do what he says? Does he promise and not come through?

At first it’s an issue of the will, we will ourselves to trust and believe in Gods faithfulness—He provides grace for such a task. With the issue of trust settled, it becomes a heart issue. We learn to allow God to heal our heart and soul, thus possess it.

Now, all our trust is in God and His will for our life. We no longer trust in our job for money—no, God’s the one who supplies all our needs and the job is just the tool He is using.

We no longer trust people or situations to rescue us, but we trust God—He’s the rescue. He will use people and situations, but they are not our hope—He is.

A lot of the time we say “If I just had that job (or that house or that spouse or that situation) then my life would be easier or better. The truth is, with that mindset our trust is misdirected.

Instead we ought to live our life knowing—Yes, God does bring opportunities that better our life and make it abundant, but those opportunities are not what we place our hope in.

Our Hope is Christ. Everything else is extra!

Proverbs 13:12 says,

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the desire comes, it is a tree of life.

Please be encouraged to place all your trust in God, where your hope will not be deferred!

Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, and whose hope is the Lord. Jeremiah 17:7

Skillful Living 101—5 Adultery

In Proverbs 5, we take a sincere look at marriage and the number one ploy of the devil to destroy God’s plan for marriage. In Proverbs 5:1-2, the Word cautions all young men to be wise and refrain from lust and immorality. “My son, pay attention to my wisdom; lend your ear to my understanding, that you may preserve discretion, and your lips may keep knowledge.” Four words in this verse are of the utmost importance for men to consider and to apply to their life; wisdom, understanding, discretion and knowledge. According to the scripture men who grab a hold and own these principles will be able to avoid immoral behavior. Men, young and old, do well to pay attention to Proverbs 5. God’s heart for men is that they would rule and subdue the earth. He desires men to humbly love Him, to find Him as Lord and source of their strength. God offers wisdom, understanding, discretion and knowledge in abundance—it’s for the asking. The righteous man only needs to abandon pride, recognize his weakness and partake in all that God has to offer. God is searching for men who will lead by godly behavior—the church, the world, wives and children long for men who will rise to the occasion abandoning costly, destructive actions. Satan on the other hand, sits and applauds while church going men cower to his plan for marriage. Proverbs 5:3-11, uncovers the truth about the immoral woman. She is bitter, sharp, her feet are attached to death, her steps lead to hell and she is unstable. It warns men to remove their way far from her—do not even go near her house, unless you want to give your years to the cruel one. Basically Satan will own you—you will be his tool, if you visit her home and in indulge in her lies. Verses 12-14, relays the gut wrenching, remorseful words men speak after visiting her bed. “How I have hated instruction and my heart despised correction! I have not obeyed the voice of my teachers, nor inclined my ear to those who instructed me!” Verses 15-19, counsels men on the truth of their marriage, telling men “Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you. Rejoice in the wife of your youth.” Asking in verse 20 “Why should you, my son, be enraptured by an immoral woman, and be embraced in the arms of a seductress?” Adultery—sad to say, is common—even in our churches. Not only does it do the obvious—destroy the covenant of marriage, but destroys God’s plan for the lonely—family. Scripture says God hates divorce but gave it for the hard hearted and only on the grounds of adultery. (Matthew 19:3-9) Satan rejoices when families are devastated by divorce. And that’s not all, Satan is after the strong—the men; he desires to sap away their manhood, steal their faith and lead them to hell. Proverbs 5:21, enlightens us, “For the ways of man are before the eyes of the Lord, and He ponders all his paths.” This verse is water to a thirsty soul. It’s refreshing to be reminded that the God who made heaven and earth sees us and ponders our path. Caring God watches over us, yearning for relationship. That’s what these warnings in Proverbs are all about—a loving God mapping out the pitfalls of life. Cautioning the men of God to avoid foolishness and steer clear of Satan’s plan for their life. Proverbs 5 ends with verses 22-23, telling what will happen to those who do not heed instruction. “His own iniquities entrap the wicked man, and he is caught in the cords of his sin. He shall die for lack of instruction, and in the greatness of his folly he shall go astray.” The Message version of the bible says it this way, “The shadow of your sin will overtake you; you’ll find yourself stumbling all over yourself in the dark. Death is the reward of an undisciplined life; your foolish decisions trap you in a dead-end.” Death is the reward for an undisciplined life—this is true for all of us. I pray our heart would embrace the ways of God. That the men of God would take heed to God’s Word allowing wisdom, understanding, discretion and knowledge to guide them. Most of all I pray that we fall deeper in love with Jesus, craving His presence and living accordingly. Everyone has a relationship with a man, whether it be your husband, son, father, brother or friend. Please be encouraged to cover them in prayer—the enemy is a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour. We must be vigilant. I understand men are not the only ones who commit adultery, women are susceptible as well and many men have been wounded by their wives committing the sin of adultery. Proverbs 5 is for both genders, please apply it accordingly. A note to those who have been devastated by adultery: Lean into to Jesus, He is enough for all your pain and rejection. God will heal you and fill in all your gaps, He will enlarge your heart and help you to find freedom in forgiveness. Skillful Living Tools for Men:

• Grab a hold and apply wisdom, understanding, discretion and knowledge to your life.
• Humbly love God, find Him as Lord and source of your strength.
• Remove your way far from the immoral woman—do not even go near her house.
• Obey the 7th commandment—Do not commit adultery.
• Rejoice in the wife of your youth.
• Abandon pride, recognize your weakness and partake in all that God has for you.
• Embrace instruction and correction.

Skillful Living Tools for Women:

• Do not be an immoral woman.
• Do not associate with immoral women.
• Pray without ceasing for the men in your life.

Wellspring

Our heart is the wellspring and source of our life, it’s the core and base of a person, a habitat of true worship to guard and set aside for God. Proverbs 4:23 says “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”

Wellspring: Defined as the head or source of a spring, stream, river; fountainhead; a source or supply of anything, especially when considered inexhaustible.

If the wellspring of a stream becomes muddy, subsequently the whole stream will grow to be polluted. We have to guard our wellspring/heart from becoming muddied by sin and its effects, so that our whole life is not tainted.

Our heart is a secret treasury to be saturated with tender thoughts of our loving God. It is our innermost being where He can dwell. Ephesians 3:16-17 in the Amplified version beautifully lays out the truth for us—our heart is to be God’s home. “May Christ through your faith [actually] dwell (settle down, abide, make His permanent home) in your hearts”

In regard to the makeup of our being: heart, soul, spirit, and body; the heart has always baffled me. It seemed emotions came from my heart, because in situations where my heart had been broken, I felt sad or hurt. Jeremiah 17:9 states, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; who can know it?”  This scripture gives the impression the heart is evil.

In my inquiries to learn about the heart, I have discovered it is primarily a soul issue. The heart will be led by either the soul or the Spirit. The fruit of a soul that is not submitted can be seen in our heart and thus the scripture in Jeremiah applies. A self-willed, prideful, rebellious, hard heart reflects a soul that is not submitted.

A submitted soul will lead a redeemed heart into a relationship with the Holy Spirit where He can live in us.  A heart that is filled with the Spirit of God, is tender, obedient, accepting and aware of God and His ways.

Since our feelings come from our emotions, the soul determines how offenses of the heart are handled. A soul drenched in self-will, most likely will lead the heart to become angry and hard when broken or offended. While with a submitted heart and soul where Christ is already at home; heart-break causes an immediate reliance and turning to God.

I’ve sought the Lord on the dichotomy of how to keep a tender heart in the midst of heartbreak and rejection. I asked Him how I could avoid pain’s poison from penetrating and polluting my heart. The answer lay in trusting God to heal my broken heart and to fill in the wounds of rejection with His love. Not just His love for me, but love and forgiveness for the person causing the offense as well.

In Ezekiel 36, God speaks of us exchanging our hard heart of solid rock for a soft, delicate, pliable heart of flesh. This alone indicates that our heart is to be kept soft and vulnerable to Him as well as those He puts in our lives.

Think of the heart as a wineskin that has to be kept oiled and supple so as not to crack when the filling comes—whether good or bad.

I once asked God to break my heart for the things that broke His. Instead of pointing me to hungry kids in Africa or the homeless, He turned my heart in the direction of a person who had hurt and rejected me. Those who cause me pain, such as the person He pointed out, make me want to run in the other direction and shut the door behind me. But, God wanted me to love and help restore this person to Him.

My heart sank within me, for the truth was—the love required for this purpose could not be found in me. This is where putting our heart in God’s hands becomes our only reality. Psalm 119:32 promises, if we run the course of His commandments, He will enlarge our heart. Loving those who hurt and betray us is accomplished through a miracle of God Himself; ever so faithfully enlarging and working in our frail human heart.

“I will praise You, O LORD, with my whole heart; I will tell of all Your marvelous works.”
Psalm 9:1

Our wellspring is to be kept pure—a place where God Himself can live. Be encouraged to guard your heart, making it a home for the love of your life!